I tried to quit by willpower - of course I asked the Lord to help me. I decided to taper off and finally got down to one cigarette a day but I just couldn't do without that one.
I tried hard - most of the time -but I just couldn't do it. I would buy a package and tell myself that I was going to break them in half and smoke a half a cigarette a day and that's it, and when the package was gone I wouldn't buy another one. Or I would buy a pack, just have one and throw the pack in the trash. Then later when I couldn't stand it I would dig in the trash and get them out, smoke one and throw them away again. And dig in the trash again..........
Once when I had an old friend who smoked come over for a visit I told her (bragged) that I had quit and she should too. I felt pretty proud of myself. Hours after she left I couldn't stand it and got her cigarette butts out of the trash and smoked them! Disgusting. Every time I gave in and smoked I felt like the biggest failure and certainly the worst Christian there ever was.
Finally one night when I was badly needing a cigarette and trying hard not to go out to the trash can (my friend had been here) I talked to the Lord and told Him, crying, that I just couldn't do it. I was sorry but I just couldn't.
............From that point on I had no desire for cigarettes! It was as if He said "No, you can't but I can!"
Thank you Jesus!!!!!!!
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